![The 5th “P” in Our Rule of Life: Provider]()
by Catherine | Mar 13, 2014 | Family, The Homefront
The adage that it’s easier to do something everyday than occasionally is definitely true for me when it comes to blogging. Onward with the Boucher Family Rule of Life!
If you have no idea what I’m writing about, I decided as part of my Lenten mission to create a Boucher Family Rule of Life based on Holly Pierlot’s A Mother’s Rule of Life. In previous posts in this series, I’ve written about:
Today, I’m resuming the series with the 5th “P”: Provider.
Today’s “P” focuses on providing for the material needs of our family and being good stewards of our finances. Today is all about giving our provider role the proper, regular attention it needs so that we can focus on the rest of our other “P”s: prayer, person, partner, and parent.
 |
| “In God We Trust” |
Yesterday, I mentioned Holly Pierlot’s metaphor that parents mirror the work of God during creation in many ways (providing for the material needs of our family, creating a mini-paradise for them, etc.). One of the ways we mirror God’s work during creation is through our work and stewardship of the resources God gives us. It is essential that we recognize a few things:
- Work is GOOD! God asked Adam to till the garden before the fall. Work is good for us.
- What we have belongs to God, so:
- we better take good care of it
- we better give God what He’s asking
So, what does all of that mean? Let’s focus on a few key areas:
Our Home
We need to maintain it, improve it, and make it a “little paradise” for our families. However, a “little paradise” has nothing to do with keeping up with the Joneses. We need to be prudent, aware of our financial resources, and use some creativity to develop our own skills in creating a haven for our families. If whatever we have belongs to God, then we can transform our attitude toward homework when we realize that we’re doing it for the Big Guy and serving our families to reveal God’s love. Practically, Holly Pierlot gives some suggestions in making your home a “mini-paradise.”
- Do a “room by room analysis”
- Decide: What is the purpose of each room? What does each room need for that purpose?
- Place items in the places where they will be used
- What do I need to remove?
- What needs to be repaired? (Remember to prioritize and budget)
- What improvements would I like to make?
- Housework
- What housework needs to be done in each room?
- How often does each task need to happen? (Daily, weekly, monthly, seasonally?)
- Who is going to do the work? (Delegate, teaching everyone that working is part of being good stewards)
- When can I schedule these chores into our day?
- Create a “home-and-property analysis” to discuss with Philip (the needs in and outside of the home including: lawn, garage, garden, repairs, purchases, future projects)
What does being a good steward look like?
- Take good care of what we already have (proper maintenance, giving everything a “home,” learn to repair things ourselves)
- Budget, budget, budget
- How much money do we have?
- Where is it going?
- What’s a want?
- What’s a need?
- Are we tithing? Are we giving God what belongs to Him? Do we think it’s “our” money?
- What debt do we have?
- What bills do we have?
- Are we saving?
- How are we wasting money? (Groceries, eating out, etc.)
- How are we helping others?
- Schedule time to:
- File receipts
- Record expenses
- Review the budget
- Plan future purchases
- Review the payment schedules of any bills and debt
- Revisit our savings and emergency fund
Are we taking it to prayer?
- Pray that God to release us from the temptation toward materialism and jealousy
- Pray for wisdom in creating & maintaining a budget
- Pray for clear communication, goals, and teamwork between Philip and I in our finances
- Pray for a transformed heart when it comes to the work we do
- Pray for peace and trust when we are in want
- Pray for generosity when we are not in want
- Pray for thanksgiving at all times
- Pray for faith that God will not be outdone in generosity when we give Him what belongs to Him
Questions for you
- What do you do when you’re struggling to find value in your work?
- Have you ever done a “room by room analysis” of your home? Do you feel like each room has a specific purpose? Is each room set up do accomplish that purpose? What changes do you need to make?
- Do you have the housework schedule in your head, or do you have the schedule written out somewhere? Do you struggle to delegate tasks because you think they won’t be accomplished properly? Are you teaching your children to be good stewards through their participation in housework?
- How are you taking care of what you already have?
- Do you have a family budget? Who handles the finances? Is one of you “in the dark” in this area? Have you considered having a regular meeting to check in? Do you have a regular time to organize this area so that the monthly bills, taxes, etc. do not become an excessive burden?
- How can you take this area of your life to prayer?
* * *
Now that I’ve tackled all “5 ‘P’s,” it’s time to start sharing how I’m drawing up our Family Rule of Life. Chapter 8 of A Mother’s Rule of Life is all about pulling your rule together. This will involve:
- creating daily time frames
- prayer time
- chore time
- meal prep/eating/clean-up
- laundry
- daily constants
- filling time between meals
- routinizing everything
- organizing weekly & seasonal schedules
- discerning through prayer when to add or remove something from the schedule
I look forward to hearing your answers to my discussion questions and getting feedback on Our Family Rule as I share it.
![The 5th "P" in Our Rule of Life: Provider]()
by Catherine | Mar 13, 2014 | Family, The Homefront
The adage that it’s easier to do something everyday than occasionally is definitely true for me when it comes to blogging. Onward with the Boucher Family Rule of Life!
If you have no idea what I’m writing about, I decided as part of my Lenten mission to create a Boucher Family Rule of Life based on Holly Pierlot’s A Mother’s Rule of Life. In previous posts in this series, I’ve written about:
Today, I’m resuming the series with the 5th “P”: Provider.
Today’s “P” focuses on providing for the material needs of our family and being good stewards of our finances. Today is all about giving our provider role the proper, regular attention it needs so that we can focus on the rest of our other “P”s: prayer, person, partner, and parent.
|
| “In God We Trust” |
Yesterday, I mentioned Holly Pierlot’s metaphor that parents mirror the work of God during creation in many ways (providing for the material needs of our family, creating a mini-paradise for them, etc.). One of the ways we mirror God’s work during creation is through our work and stewardship of the resources God gives us. It is essential that we recognize a few things:
- Work is GOOD! God asked Adam to till the garden before the fall. Work is good for us.
- What we have belongs to God, so:
- we better take good care of it
- we better give God what He’s asking
So, what does all of that mean? Let’s focus on a few key areas:
Our Home
We need to maintain it, improve it, and make it a “little paradise” for our families. However, a “little paradise” has nothing to do with keeping up with the Joneses. We need to be prudent, aware of our financial resources, and use some creativity to develop our own skills in creating a haven for our families. If whatever we have belongs to God, then we can transform our attitude toward homework when we realize that we’re doing it for the Big Guy and serving our families to reveal God’s love. Practically, Holly Pierlot gives some suggestions in making your home a “mini-paradise.”
- Do a “room by room analysis”
- Decide: What is the purpose of each room? What does each room need for that purpose?
- Place items in the places where they will be used
- What do I need to remove?
- What needs to be repaired? (Remember to prioritize and budget)
- What improvements would I like to make?
- Housework
- What housework needs to be done in each room?
- How often does each task need to happen? (Daily, weekly, monthly, seasonally?)
- Who is going to do the work? (Delegate, teaching everyone that working is part of being good stewards)
- When can I schedule these chores into our day?
- Create a “home-and-property analysis” to discuss with Philip (the needs in and outside of the home including: lawn, garage, garden, repairs, purchases, future projects)
What does being a good steward look like?
- Take good care of what we already have (proper maintenance, giving everything a “home,” learn to repair things ourselves)
- Budget, budget, budget
- How much money do we have?
- Where is it going?
- What’s a want?
- What’s a need?
- Are we tithing? Are we giving God what belongs to Him? Do we think it’s “our” money?
- What debt do we have?
- What bills do we have?
- Are we saving?
- How are we wasting money? (Groceries, eating out, etc.)
- How are we helping others?
- Schedule time to:
- File receipts
- Record expenses
- Review the budget
- Plan future purchases<
/li>
- Review the payment schedules of any bills and debt
- Revisit our savings and emergency fund
Are we taking it to prayer?
- Pray that God to release us from the temptation toward materialism and jealousy
- Pray for wisdom in creating & maintaining a budget
- Pray for clear communication, goals, and teamwork between Philip and I in our finances
- Pray for a transformed heart when it comes to the work we do
- Pray for peace and trust when we are in want
- Pray for generosity when we are not in want
- Pray for thanksgiving at all times
- Pray for faith that God will not be outdone in generosity when we give Him what belongs to Him
Questions for you
- What do you do when you’re struggling to find value in your work?
- Have you ever done a “room by room analysis” of your home? Do you feel like each room has a specific purpose? Is each room set up do accomplish that purpose? What changes do you need to make?
- Do you have the housework schedule in your head, or do you have the schedule written out somewhere? Do you struggle to delegate tasks because you think they won’t be accomplished properly? Are you teaching your children to be good stewards through their participation in housework?
- How are you taking care of what you already have?
- Do you have a family budget? Who handles the finances? Is one of you “in the dark” in this area? Have you considered having a regular meeting to check in? Do you have a regular time to organize this area so that the monthly bills, taxes, etc. do not become an excessive burden?
- How can you take this area of your life to prayer?
* * *
Now that I’ve tackled all “5 ‘P’s,” it’s time to start sharing how I’m drawing up our Family Rule of Life. Chapter 8 of A Mother’s Rule of Life is all about pulling your rule together. This will involve:
- creating daily time frames
- prayer time
- chore time
- meal prep/eating/clean-up
- laundry
- daily constants
- filling time between meals
- routinizing everything
- organizing weekly & seasonal schedules
- discerning through prayer when to add or remove something from the schedule
I look forward to hearing your answers to my discussion questions and getting feedback on Our Family Rule as I share it.
![The 4th “P” in Our Rule of Life: Parent]()
by Catherine | Mar 12, 2014 | Family, The Homefront
Whew, it’s been waaaaaaaaaaaaaay longer than I intended to return to the 5 P’s of our family’s rule of life. It turns out selling a home with three small children is no small feat! The good news is that St. Joseph is THE MAN, and he has already proven himself a powerful intercessor for our family. Please join us as we pray the Novena to St. Joseph! (We’re on Day 3 to culminate on his feast day next Wednesday, but you can pray these prayers anytime.)
In case you’ve missed my previous posts in this series, I decided as part of my Lenten mission to create a Boucher Family Rule of Life. It’s based off of Holly Pierlot’s book A Mother’s Rule of Life. In previous posts in this series, I wrote about:
Today, I’m tackling the 4th “P”: Parent.
As a former high school Spanish teacher, I can tell you what a difference it makes when parents take their role as primary educators of their children seriously. It was easy to identify children who came from homes where their parents led as primary educators instead of passing the buck along to the teachers at school.
Regardless of whether or not God calls me to homeschool at any time, I will always be my children’s primary educator. Holly Pierlot calls a mother’s role as a primary educator to her children the “mission of motherhood.” That means I need to give this whole stay-at-home mom gig the dignity it deserves–even if the world doesn’t. I need to take seriously the impact day-to-day living in this domestic church has on all of the members of our family. I need to take seriously the impact our children’s witness will have in our local community and larger society as they leave the four walls of our home.
Now, in the midst of the diapers, dirty dishes, and mountains of laundry, I need to recognize how irreplaceable my presence is to my children. It’s not just my job to watch them like some kind of glorified babysitter. I’m supposed to be helping to form them. In A Mother’s Rule of Life, Holly Pierlot talks about coming to the realization that “parents image God’s work at creation.”
 |
| From the ceiling of the Sistine Chapel, the Creation of Adam. |
Holly expands the metaphor, describing the parallels between the work that God performed back in Genesis with Adam and Eve and the work that we perform as parents:
- Provide food and shelter
- Create a paradise (our homes are to be a “mini-paradise,” “a place of beauty and peace and harmony”
- Be in close communication
- Infuse them with knowledge for their survival (temporally and eternally) and equip them to be good stewards of creation
- Teach them the value of work and delegate responsibility
- Govern, lead, and discipline
- Forgive children for trespasses, “cover their sins with love,” but teach them “the just consequences of their actions”
After looking at all of those responsibilities we have as parents, especially as mothers, it’s hard to view our work as ordinary and meaningless. I love, love, love Holly’s definition of what it means to provide our children with a Catholic education. She says that parenting “is a call to form persons. We’re called to bring God to our children’s spirits, truth to their minds, health to their bodies, skill to their hands, beauty and creativity to their hearts, and in all this, virtue to their wills and sanctity to their souls.” Dang. Re-read that. Pope Pius XI had another way of saying that. He said, “Education consists essentially in preparing man for what he must be, and for what he must do here below, in order to attain the sublime end for which he was created.” Ultimately, both Holly Pierlot and Pope Pius XI are saying that our homes need to be domestic churches where we propel our children along the path to sainthood.
That goal became very real for Philip and I when we miscarried our baby, Thérèse, at 12 weeks. We entrust her to God’s mercy and believe that she is in heaven (and, therefore, a saint). We frequently ask her for her intercession. Being separated from Therese further inspires us to get every member of our family to heaven.
That all sounds fine and dandy, but let’s “get down to brass tacks” and talk about how to make that goal happen practically. To help our kiddos get an “ST” in front of their names, I re-read the section on parenting in Holly Pierlot’s A Mother’s Rule of Life. Here are a few areas I considered and used to create a saint-making action plan:
Open up the channel of grace to God
- Attend daily Mass at least once a week in addition to Sunday Mass
- Monthly confession for everyone that’s old enough (put it on the calendar!)
- Family prayer time (morning, mid-day, after dinner & bedtime prayer together)
- Access to sacramentals and prayer aids (Holy water, Rosaries, Bibles, lives of the saints, etc.)
- Pray for the children (ask for their intentions, spontaneously offer prayer throughout the day, and pray with Philip for the children before bed)
- Dedicate formal & informal teaching times to talk about & celebrate the saint of the day, virtues, current events in the Church, parts of the Mass, feast days, baptismal anniversaries (start with “Circle Time” in the morning and build from there)
Consider if I’m Being a Channel of God’s Love
- Model the behaviors I’m asking of other members of the family. Am I revealing God’s love to them in the way I treat them? (Examine this during my weekly Examination of Conscience)
- Be available and treat my children as my vocation instead of an obstacle to it – stop whatever I’m doing, make eye contact, listen, and respond with love
- Treat my children as the unique children of God that they are (identify their strengths & weaknesses, encourage them, and help them in whatever appropriate ways possible)
- Do what’s best for them (food, sleep, appropriate chores, playtime, surprise activities for refreshment)
Discipline
- Maintain the children’s free will like God does. Teach them to accept negative consequences instead of trying to bend their wills.
- Consider if the child’s behavior is an isolated act or a habit of disobedience. (If it’s habitual behavior, consider the root cause, and work to find a solution.)
Consistency
- Make sure what I’m asking is reasonable & justified, and take the time to enforce it
Create Opportunities for Them to Exercise Freedom Within a Framework
- Allow them to make choices (clothing, menu planning, recreation activities, etc.)
- Help weigh the options (what’s good & what’s not)
- Discuss potential consequences
- Let them make the decision and face the consequences
Find a Place for Everything
- Maintain outer order in the home to create inner order for everyone
- Teach the children where things go
- Take the time to enforce that things need to be put back “home” instead of doing it myself
Find a Time for Everything
- Hygiene
- Exercise
- God time (prayer, Mass, confession, etc.)
- Learning (formal & informal learning, homework)
- Recreation (sports, hobbies, friends)
- Meals (including preparation & clean-up)
- Cleaning
- Laundry
- Sleep & rest
- Set aside time to teach the components of the routine
Set the Family Up for Success to Start the Routine
- Create, print, & laminate charts for various tasks around the home to teach the children (bathroom, getting dressed, laundry, meal clean-up, etc.)
- Make time to teach to reduce frustration for everyone
- Observe the children working and revise when necessary
- Re-teach and model
- Adjust expectations
- Provide motivation (creating a reward system to implement by the end of Lent)
- Teach the importance of hard work
- Teach about redemptive suffering (and enter into it with them!)
- Suggest ways to make the work easier
- Change the time of day they are performing the task
- Allow them to choose tasks
- Read stories of saints that exhibit determination or hard work
- Use logical consequences
- Remove privileges
- Make sure everyone is getting the grace they need to perform their duties
- Specifically, how do you open up the channels of grace to God for every member of your family?
- How do you hold yourself accountable to be a channel of God’s love?
- Are you and your husband on the same team in the discipline department? What changes need to happen? How can you be more consistent?
- What are you doing (small or big) to gradually develop your children’s inner moral compass?
- Are there problem areas or “hot spots” that regularly collect clutter in your home? The kitchen counter or dining room table? Can you set a goal to find a home for the items on those surfaces during Lent? Do you have too many things and need to live more simply?
- Are you building time into your schedule to do everything that needs to be done? Do you include time for things like meal preparation or clean-up? How can you limit the feelings of frustration or being rushed?
- How have you taught your other family members to maintain a routine? Do you have any tips to share?
- What did I forget? I’ve only been a parent for 4 years, so I know I still have a lot to learn! Share away, please and thank you!
* * *
In the next posts in this series, I will write about:
- The 5th “P”: Provider
- What Our Family Rule looks like, and where I am with putting it together
![The 4th "P" in Our Rule of Life: Parent]()
by Catherine | Mar 12, 2014 | Family, The Homefront
Whew, it’s been waaaaaaaaaaaaaay longer than I intended to return to the 5 P’s of our family’s rule of life. It turns out selling a home with three small children is no small feat! The good news is that St. Joseph is THE MAN, and he has already proven himself a powerful intercessor for our family. Please join us as we pray the Novena to St. Joseph! (We’re on Day 3 to culminate on his feast day next Wednesday, but you can pray these prayers anytime.)
In case you’ve missed my previous posts in this series, I decided as part of my Lenten mission to create a Boucher Family Rule of Life. It’s based off of Holly Pierlot’s book A Mother’s Rule of Life. In previous posts in this series, I wrote about:
Today, I’m tackling the 4th “P”: Parent.
As a former high school Spanish teacher, I can tell you what a difference it makes when parents take their role as primary educators of their children seriously. It was easy to identify children who came from homes where their parents led as primary educators instead of passing the buck along to the teachers at school.
Regardless of whether or not God calls me to homeschool at any time, I will always be my children’s primary educator. Holly Pierlot calls a mother’s role as a primary educator to her children the “mission of motherhood.” That means I need to give this whole stay-at-home mom gig the dignity it deserves–even if the world doesn’t. I need to take seriously the impact day-to-day living in this domestic church has on all of the members of our family. I need to take seriously the impact our children’s witness will have in our local community and larger society as they leave the four walls of our home.
Now, in the midst of the diapers, dirty dishes, and mountains of laundry, I need to recognize how irreplaceable my presence is to my children. It’s not just my job to watch them like some kind of glorified babysitter. I’m supposed to be helping to form them. In A Mother’s Rule of Life, Holly Pierlot talks about coming to the realization that “parents image God’s work at creation.”
|
| From the ceiling of the Sistine Chapel, the Creation of Adam. |
Holly expands the metaphor, describing the parallels between the work that God performed back in Genesis with Adam and Eve and the work that we perform as parents:
- Provide food and shelter
- Create a paradise (our homes are to be a “mini-paradise,” “a place of beauty and peace and harmony”
- Be in close communication
- Infuse them with knowledge for their survival (temporally and eternally) and equip them to be good stewards of creation
- Teach them the value of work and delegate responsibility
- Govern, lead, and discipline
- Forgive children for trespasses, “cover their sins with love,” but teach them “the just consequences of their actions”
After looking at all of those responsibilities we have as parents, especially as mothers, it’s hard to view our work as ordinary and meaningless. I love, love, love Holly’s definition of what it means to provide our children with a Catholic education. She says that parenting “is a call to form persons. We’re called to bring God to our children’s spirits, truth to their minds, health to their bodies, skill to their hands, beauty and creativity to their hearts, and in all this, virtue to their wills and sanctity to their souls.” Dang. Re-read that. Pope Pius XI had another way of saying that. He said, “Education consists essentially in preparing man for what he must be, and for what he must do here below, in order to attain the sublime end for which he was created.” Ultimately, both Holly Pierlot and Pope Pius XI are saying that our homes need to be domestic churches where we propel our children along the path to sainthood.
That goal became very real for Philip and I when we miscarried our baby, Thérèse, at 12 weeks. We entrust her to God’s mercy and believe that she is in heaven (and, therefore, a saint). We frequently ask her for her intercession. Being separated from Therese further inspires us to get every member of our family to heaven.
That all sounds fine and dandy, but let’s “get down to brass tacks” and talk about how to make that goal happen practically. To help our kiddos get an “ST” in front of their names, I re-read the section on parenting in Holly Pierlot’s A Mother’s Rule of Life. Here are a few areas I considered and used to create a saint-making action plan:
Open up the channel of grace to God
- Attend daily Mass at least once a week in addition to Sunday Mass
- Monthly confession for everyone that’s old enough (put it on the calendar!)
- Family prayer time (morning, mid-day, after dinner & bedtime prayer together)
- Access to sacramentals and prayer aids (Holy water, Rosaries, Bibles, lives of the saints, etc.)
- Pray for the children (ask for their intentions, spontaneously offer prayer throughout the day, and pray with Philip for the children before bed)
- Dedicate formal & informal teaching times to talk about & celebrate the saint of the day, virt
ues, current events in the Church, parts of the Mass, feast days, baptismal anniversaries (start with “Circle Time” in the morning and build from there)
Consider if I’m Being a Channel of God’s Love
- Model the behaviors I’m asking of other members of the family. Am I revealing God’s love to them in the way I treat them? (Examine this during my weekly Examination of Conscience)
- Be available and treat my children as my vocation instead of an obstacle to it – stop whatever I’m doing, make eye contact, listen, and respond with love
- Treat my children as the unique children of God that they are (identify their strengths & weaknesses, encourage them, and help them in whatever appropriate ways possible)
- Do what’s best for them (food, sleep, appropriate chores, playtime, surprise activities for refreshment)
Discipline
- Maintain the children’s free will like God does. Teach them to accept negative consequences instead of trying to bend their wills.
- Consider if the child’s behavior is an isolated act or a habit of disobedience. (If it’s habitual behavior, consider the root cause, and work to find a solution.)
Consistency
- Make sure what I’m asking is reasonable & justified, and take the time to enforce it
Create Opportunities for Them to Exercise Freedom Within a Framework
- Allow them to make choices (clothing, menu planning, recreation activities, etc.)
- Help weigh the options (what’s good & what’s not)
- Discuss potential consequences
- Let them make the decision and face the consequences
Find a Place for Everything
- Maintain outer order in the home to create inner order for everyone
- Teach the children where things go
- Take the time to enforce that things need to be put back “home” instead of doing it myself
Find a Time for Everything
- Hygiene
- Exercise
- God time (prayer, Mass, confession, etc.)
- Learning (formal & informal learning, homework)
- Recreation (sports, hobbies, friends)
- Meals (including preparation & clean-up)
- Cleaning
- Laundry
- Sleep & rest
- Set aside time to teach the components of the routine
Set the Family Up for Success to Start the Routine
- Create, print, & laminate charts for various tasks around the home to teach the children (bathroom, getting dressed, laundry, meal clean-up, etc.)
- Make time to teach to reduce frustration for everyone
- Observe the children working and revise when necessary
- Re-teach and model
- Adjust expectations
- Provide motivation (creating a reward system to implement by the end of Lent)
- Teach the importance of hard work
- Teach about redemptive suffering (and enter into it with them!)
- Suggest ways to make the work easier
- Change the time of day they are performing the task
- Allow them to choose tasks
- Read stories of saints that exhibit determination or hard work
- Use logical consequences
- Remove privileges
- Make sure everyone is getting the grace they need to perform their duties
- Specifically, how do you open up the channels of grace to God for every member of your family?
- How do you hold yourself accountable to be a channel of God’s love?
- Are you and your husband on the same team in the discipline department? What changes need to happen? How can you be more consistent?
- What are you doing (small or big) to gradually develop your children’s inner moral compass?
- Are there problem areas or “hot spots” that regularly collect clutter in your home? The kitchen counter or dining room table? Can you set a goal to find a home for the items on those surfaces during Lent? Do you have too many things and need to live more simply?
- Are you building time into your schedule to do everything that needs to be done? Do you include time for things like meal preparation or clean-up? How can you limit the feelings of frustration or being rushed?
- How have you taught your other family members to maintain a routine? Do you have any tips to share?
- What did I forget? I’ve only been a parent for 4 years, so I know I still have a lot to learn! Share away, please and thank you!
* * *
In the next posts in this series, I will write about:
- The 5th “P”: Provider
- What Our Family Rule looks like, and where I am with putting it together
![Small Success Thursday #9]()
by Catherine | Mar 6, 2014 | Family
Here are a few of our small successes from this week:
It’s March, so that means we have 4 more months of residency! Yahoo!!!
I successfully completed Jen Fulwiler’s “7 Posts, 7 Days” challenge.
In the midst of the craziness with the house yesterday, we made it to Mass and remembered to fast & abstain.
Jane loves feeding Harry and fed him all of his peas yesterday. Sweet big sister offered to play with Harry while I cleaned up his chair. Harry loves it when Janie blows raspberries on his tummy!
So much cuteness has happened this morning! I’m calling it a success that there’s so much love around this house today.
As we were loading up to take Jane to preschool, Jane and Walt decided to sing Harry a lullaby in his carseat. I love Harry’s big grin as his big sibs sing to him.
While I was cleaning the breakfast dishes, Walt ran into the kitchen and squeezed my leg. “Thanks for being my girl, Mama. I love you.” I don’t know where he picked up the phrase “my girl,” but this mama is loving it.
Before we pulled into the school parking lot, Walt turned to Janie and said, “I’m gonna miss you, Janie!” Without skipping a beat, she said, “I’m gonna miss YOOOOOOOOOOU, Walt!”
We’ve had a lot of interest in the house since we listed on Monday, and we just *might* be done with showings. I like to say that “it ain’t over til it’s over” with the house stuff, and I probably won’t be breathing easy until we’re pulling away in the moving van, but, for now, things are looking good. Please pray all continues to go well as both parties dot our “i”s an cross our “t”s, have the inspection, and near the closing date. If I can get a little greedy with my prayer requests, please also pray that we find a home in Lincoln within our new parish boundaries. Unfortunately, there isn’t much on the market right now, so we’re hoping a home will come on the market very soon. Way to go, prayer warriors!
Your turn! What are your small successes from this week? Head on over to CatholicMom to read other small successes and share your own triumphs. If you’re using social media, use the hashtag #SmallSuccess.
![The House is Officially On the Market!]()
by Catherine | Mar 4, 2014 | Family
Yay! Our house is officially on the market as of today!
We had two scheduled showings this late afternoon/early evening. Unfortunately, one had to cancel due to a family emergency (and I pray that everything is okay!). We’re hoping the steady stream of interest will continue this week and that we’ll see an offer soon. Hopefully no one will want to have a showing during nap time!
Monty decided he wasn’t up for evacuating our house during showings because he gets carsick. Instead, he’s staying in our basement living area in his cage. He left a note for all of our visitors, and he’s hoping that they’ll give him a treat for being such a good boy.
Here’s his sign:
For a little fun, I’d love for you to place your bets on how many days our home will be on the market. Wise guys that want to upset me with guesses like 366 days need not participate! Philip guesses 8 days, and I’m going to guess 23 days so that I don’t get my hopes up TOO high. What’s your guess?
Philip’s mom is so thoughtful! She sent us a St. Joseph statue and holy card. Jane placed the statue in her and Walt’s room, and she is so proud that he’s on their dresser.
St. Joseph, pray for us!
![The 3rd “P” in Our Rule of Life: Partner]()
by Catherine | Mar 3, 2014 | Marriage
If you have no idea what I’m writing about, I decided to create our own Boucher Family Rule of Life as part of my Lenten mission. It’s modeled after Holly Pierlot’s A Mother’s Rule of Life. In previous posts in this series, I’ve written about:
I’m resuming the series today with the 3rd “P”: Partner.
 |
| I love how our photographer captured this older couple walking toward us as we walked around downtown on our wedding day. I call it foreshadowing! |
When it comes to marriage, I keep coming back to these 2 quotes to help me form our Family Rule:
- “Marriage is meant to enable us to fulfill a mission–in this instance, a mission of service and love toward our spouse.” – Holly Pierlot, A Mother’s Rule of Life
- Love is “availability, acceptance, and help.” – Blessed Pope John Paul II
Keeping those two things in mind, Philip and I agree that these things need to be top priorities:
- Setting apart time each night to just be with each other and “check in”after the kids are in bed – give each other our complete attention, make our words
- Regular date nights (we swap babysitting with another couple so that we have at least one date night per month without having to pay for a sitter)
- At-home date night (Our at-home date night jar helps for inspiration!)
- Perform tiny acts of love whenever possible – make Philip’s coffee, make Philip’s lunch when he’s not eating hospital food next year (with a love note!), clean up after Philip or help finish an incomplete task without nagging or pointing out fault, fill up the car, prepare healthy snacks, suggest we see the action film instead of the rom-com on date night, etc.
- Work on my own faults and behaviors before trying to change his
- Keep the lines of communication open by “keeping short accounts” and checking in regularly, take a “time out” if we’re getting upset, choose our moments wisely, and no piling on previous hurts
- Couple prayer time before bed and sharing a holy hour (alternate who goes each week)
- Pray for one another during our individual prayer time and ask the other person to pray for specific intentions
- Remove obstacles to intimacy and regularly check in with each other (NFP helps us to make sure that this is a regular topic of conversation)
- Regularly answer Holly Pierlot’s questions during my weekly journaling & examination of conscience:
- Are you taking full responsibility with your husband in all spheres of your marriage?
- Is there any area you’re shirking?
- Is there any part of your marriage in which you’re being controlling?
- How can you change?
Questions for you:
- What did I forget on the topic of marriage?
- How do you keep the spark alive between yourself and your spouse?
- How do you date on a budget?
- What do you do to model healthy conflict resolution in front of your children? (We recently created some rules for ourselves in this area!)
- Do you have the habit of picking out your spouse’s faults on a regular basis? Do you do so in front of your children?
- In what specific ways can you change? How can you take on full responsibility or stop shirking in some areas? Do you need to learn how to let go?
* * *
This is my 7th of 7 posts in Jen Fulwiler’s “7 Days, 7 Posts” challenge. Come on over, join in the funk link-up, and read some great blogs!
![The 3rd "P" in Our Rule of Life: Partner]()
by Catherine | Mar 3, 2014 | Marriage
If you have no idea what I’m writing about, I decided to create our own Boucher Family Rule of Life as part of my Lenten mission. It’s modeled after Holly Pierlot’s A Mother’s Rule of Life. In previous posts in this series, I’ve written about:
I’m resuming the series today with the 3rd “P”: Partner.
|
| I love how our photographer captured this older couple walking toward us as we walked around downtown on our wedding day. I call it foreshadowing! |
When it comes to marriage, I keep coming back to these 2 quotes to help me form our Family Rule:
- “Marriage is meant to enable us to fulfill a mission–in this instance, a mission of service and love toward our spouse.” – Holly Pierlot, A Mother’s Rule of Life
- Love is “availability, acceptance, and help.” – Blessed Pope John Paul II
Keeping those two things in mind, Philip and I agree that these things need to be top priorities:
- Setting apart time each night to just be with each other and “check in”after the kids are in bed – give each other our complete attention, make our words
- Regular date nights (we swap babysitting with another couple so that we have at least one date night per month without having to pay for a sitter)
- At-home date night (Our at-home date night jar helps for inspiration!)
- Perform tiny acts of love whenever possible – make Philip’s coffee, make Philip’s lunch when he’s not eating hospital food next year (with a love note!), clean up after Philip or help finish an incomplete task without nagging or pointing out fault, fill up the car, prepare healthy snacks, suggest we see the action film instead of the rom-com on date night, etc.
- Work on my own faults and behaviors before trying to change his
- Keep the lines of communication open by “keeping short accounts” and checking in regularly, take a “time out” if we’re getting upset, choose our moments wisely, and no piling on previous hurts
- Couple prayer time before bed and sharing a holy hour (alternate who goes each week)
- Pray for one another during our individual prayer time and ask the other person to pray for specific intentions
- Remove obstacles to intimacy and regularly check in with each other (NFP helps us to make sure that this is a regular topic of conversation)
- Regularly answer Holly Pierlot’s questions during my weekly journaling & examination of conscience:
- Are you taking full responsibility with your husband in all spheres of your marriage?
- Is there any area you’re shirking?
- Is there any part of your marriage in which you’re being controlling?
- How can you change?
Questions for you:
- What did I forget on the topic of marriage?
- How do you keep the spark alive between yourself and your spouse?
- How do you date on a budget?
- What do you do to model healthy conflict resolution in front of your children? (We recently created some rules for ourselves in this area!)
- Do you have the habit of picking out your spouse’s faults on a regular basis? Do you do so in front of your children?
- In what specific ways can you change? How can you take on full responsibility or stop shirking in some areas? Do you need to learn how to let go?
* * *
This is my 7th of 7 posts in Jen Fulwiler’s “7 Days, 7 Posts” challenge. Come on over, join in the funk link-up, and read some great blogs!
![The 2nd “P” in Our Rule of Life: Person]()
by Catherine | Mar 1, 2014 | Everything Else, Faith
If you have no idea what I’m writing about, I decided to create our own Boucher Family Rule of Life as part of my lenten mission. It’s modeled after Holly Pierlot’s A Mother’s Rule of Life. In previous posts on this topic, I have written about:
(Note: When I said I’d tackle 1 P each day for the next 5 days, I should have said, “I’ll tackle 1 P at my earliest convenience because we’re putting our house on the market.”)
Today, I’m looking at the 2nd “P” in a Rule of Life: Person.
The 2nd “P,” Person, is an essential part of our Rule of Life. Examining the Person isn’t about naval gazing; it’s a humbling moment to examine ourselves (good and bad) in order to make the necessary changes to become what God intends us to be. In the Garden of Eden, Adam and Eve’s reason and intellect were in complete communion with God’s will for them. This gave them complete independence because they were free of attachments to sin. Have you ever heard the phrase, “sin makes you stupid”? When I live in patterns of sin, I find myself in bondage to them. When sins become habitual, it’s easier to reason them away or blindly give in to temptation, and it becomes harder and harder to break free. Examining my weaknesses and tendencies to sin with the intention to change is so liberating!
Holly Pierlot quoted her university professor, Fr. Tom Daley, as saying that “freedom is taking responsibility for who you are to become.” If I want to live out our family’s mission statement to be a domestic church where saints are made, I need to take responsibility for taking the necessary steps to become who God wants me to be. In order to do that, I need to take a holistic approach to ensure that every area of my personhood is in balance.
So, I examined a few areas:
Psychological and Emotional Health
In her section on Person, Holly Pierlot suggests asking yourself a few questions to determine why you react the way you do.
- Why do I feel this way?
- Why is this bothering me?
- Where have I encountered this before in my life?
- What does this make me think of?
These simple questions helped me to realize that I respond to the world around me because of the accumulation of past experiences. Taking a moment to think about these questions, especially when I find my anger surfacing, is extremely helpful. Usually, my anger is tied to a previous hurt unrelated to the moment at hand. This exercise taught me that I need to work on processing my emotions more than simply relegating them to the back of my mind because it’s easier to ignore them.
In addition to thinking about these questions, I am going to start journaling regularly. I am going to start a weekly thorough examination of conscience. This will help me to uncover habits of sin and hopefully help me to break those cycles. Recognizing these chinks in my spiritual armor and asking God to strengthen me where I am weak is a good place to start.
I’d love to find a spiritual director after we move to help me further identify and work on overcoming habits of sin.
Rest
This is me without enough sleep:
I earned the nickname “Kindergarten Catherine” when I attended all day kindergarten while still desperately needing a nap. It was probably the longest year of my mother’s life! I’m 29, and my family still teases me about this! I need my sleep. For this mama, that means 7-8 hours of sleep to be fully functioning. Philip and I have a new rule that we must be in bed by 9:30, and lights go out at 10. This ensures that I’m rested enough to rise before the children at 5:30 for prayer and exercise.
Aside from getting adequate rest at night, Holly Pierlot wrote about having a “Mother’s Sabbath.” For her, a Mother’s Sabbath is her regular time away for “rest, solitude, and restoration with God.” She takes one Saturday away every other week to go to Adoration, confession, run errands, read, etc. She reasons that even Jesus took time away to pray and that we all need to get away in order to recharge. In our family, a few hours on a Saturday once a month would be divine! Since Philip is away from home all week, he doesn’t have the same desire I do to get out of the house, and he wants to be a homebody most weekends. Having this regular opportunity to get out by myself would do me some good. I see myself going to confession, spending time in Adoration, running a few errands, reading at a coffee shop, and working on my blog. I haven’t had a Mother’s Sabbath yet, but I doubt I’ll have trouble making it up as I go!
In addition to my Mother’s Sabbath, I need time to rest with my gal pals without our kiddos. Philip and I think that having some girl time (aside from my Bible study and parish mothers group) two times a month is a healthy amount. (Likewise, he is supposed to schedule regular outings for himself with his buddies.)
Nutrition
I’m still using the Paprika app to organize my recipes and plan our weekly menu. Having a plan in place reduces the amount that we’re eating out and helps us to eat more nutritiously. I build in healthy snacks throughout the week. I need to work on prepping the snacks ahead of time (cut up fruits and vegetables) so that I can access them more easily than the less healthy options. Simply having a list of nutritious snack ideas helps, too.
Exercise
I haven’t been able to get my regular exercise in because we’ve had a constantly shifting schedule during the day with Baby Harry. Now that he’s 6 months and has a relatively regular schedule with sleeping and eating, I’m finally ready to say that I have time to exercise at a regular time. I’ve decided it makes the most sense for me to exercise after my morning prayers before I make breakfast for the kids. If they wake up during this time, they can have quiet reading time until I’m done with my 30 Day Shred DVD. They love acting like my personal trainers with cheerleading or even joining in next to me, so maybe this will turn into a family activity!
Medication
I am so grateful to my Catholic OBGYN and nurse practitioner for helping to treat my hormone irregularities. Through using the Creighton Model and doing a simple blood draw, we were able to identify a progesterone deficiency. Supplementing my progesterone levels helped me to maintain a healthy pregnancy when I was pregnant with Harry. Assuming my progesterone levels remain low in the future, I will be able to get supplements earlier to greatly limit my risk of miscarriage. During the post-partum phase, my nurse practitioner was able to identify post-partum depression and successfully treat me with progesterone therapy. As my body gets back into the swing of things with a cycle, I am going to be on the lookout for PMS as progesterone therapy can limit those symptoms as well. I think Philip would appreciate that, too!
Hygiene and Grooming
With exercising in the morning, I’m still trying to figure out the best time to shower. When do you exercise and shower? I don’t think I’ll ever be a shower in the evening kinda gal. I never feel clean that way. I think I need to move my wake-up call to 5:00 in order to get it all done without interruption. We’ll see how my first week goes. Right now, I’m thinking things will look like this:
- 5:30 Wake up and get dressed to exercise
- 5:40-6:00 Eat breakfast and morning prayer (Daily Readings, Gospel reflection, Morning Offering)
- 6:00 30 Day Shred DVD
- 6:30 Shower (kids have quiet reading time if they’re awake)
- 7:00 Breakfast with kids
Blogging
30 minutes during the kids’ nap time
A few questions for you on the 2nd “P” of Person:
- How do you work on overcoming areas or habits of sin? Do you journal?
- What about rest? What kind of sleep are you getting lately? Do you have something resembling a Mother’s Sabbath? What would your time away look like?
- How do you plan your weekly menu for your crew? Do you have any tips or recipes you’d like to share?
- All of us are busy, but how do you find time to exercise? Do you have a program you love? Do you have any advice for a mama with little ones?
- Is there something you’re eating or a nutrition supplement that’s helping you to feel better? Have you identified any areas of concern in your health?
- When do you fit in your grooming needs? I’d love any tips or advice in this area since it’s tough to get ready AND exercise with the little ones!
- Blogger friends, how do you organize and fit in time to blog? Do you do something to help you organize your thoughts? I feel like my method is to pre-write it all in my head the day before and “brain dump” whenever I get a free chunk of time!
* * *
This is my 6th of 7 posts in Jen Fulwiler’s “7 Days, 7 Posts” challenge. Come on over, join in the fun link-up, and read some great blogs!
![The 2nd "P" in Our Rule of Life: Person]()
by Catherine | Mar 1, 2014 | Everything Else, Faith
If you have no idea what I’m writing about, I decided to create our own Boucher Family Rule of Life as part of my lenten mission. It’s modeled after Holly Pierlot’s A Mother’s Rule of Life. In previous posts on this topic, I have written about:
(Note: When I said I’d tackle 1 P each day for the next 5 days, I should have said, “I’ll tackle 1 P at my earliest convenience because we’re putting our house on the market.”)
Today, I’m looking at the 2nd “P” in a Rule of Life: Person.
The 2nd “P,” Person, is an essential part of our Rule of Life. Examining the Person isn’t about naval gazing; it’s a humbling moment to examine ourselves (good and bad) in order to make the necessary changes to become what God intends us to be. In the Garden of Eden, Adam and Eve’s reason and intellect were in complete communion with God’s will for them. This gave them complete independence because they were free of attachments to sin. Have you ever heard the phrase, “sin makes you stupid”? When I live in patterns of sin, I find myself in bondage to them. When sins become habitual, it’s easier to reason them away or blindly give in to temptation, and it becomes harder and harder to break free. Examining my weaknesses and tendencies to sin with the intention to change is so liberating!
Holly Pierlot quoted her university professor, Fr. Tom Daley, as saying that “freedom is taking responsibility for who you are to become.” If I want to live out our family’s mission statement to be a domestic church where saints are made, I need to take responsibility for taking the necessary steps to become who God wants me to be. In order to do that, I need to take a holistic approach to ensure that every area of my personhood is in balance.
So, I examined a few areas:
Psychological and Emotional Health
In her section on Person, Holly Pierlot suggests asking yourself a few questions to determine why you react the way you do.
- Why do I feel this way?
- Why is this bothering me?
- Where have I encountered this before in my life?
- What does this make me think of?
These simple questions helped me to realize that I respond to the world around me because of the accumulation of past experiences. Taking a moment to think about these questions, especially when I find my anger surfacing, is extremely helpful. Usually, my anger is tied to a previous hurt unrelated to the moment at hand. This exercise taught me that I need to work on processing my emotions more than simply relegating them to the back of my mind because it’s easier to ignore them.
In addition to thinking about these questions, I am going to start journaling regularly. I am going to start a weekly thorough examination of conscience. This will help me to uncover habits of sin and hopefully help me to break those cycles. Recognizing these chinks in my spiritual armor and asking God to strengthen me where I am weak is a good place to start.
I’d love to find a spiritual director after we move to help me further identify and work on overcoming habits of sin.
Rest
This is me without enough sleep:
I earned the nickname “Kindergarten Catherine” when I attended all day kindergarten while still desperately needing a nap. It was probably the longest year of my mother’s life! I’m 29, and my family still teases me about this! I need my sleep. For this mama, that means 7-8 hours of sleep to be fully functioning. Philip and I have a new rule that we must be in bed by 9:30, and lights go out at 10. This ensures that I’m rested enough to rise before the children at 5:30 for prayer and exercise.
Aside from getting adequate rest at night, Holly Pierlot wrote about having a “Mother’s Sabbath.” For her, a Mother’s Sabbath is her regular time away for “rest, solitude, and restoration with God.” She takes one Saturday away every other week to go to Adoration, confession, run errands, read, etc. She reasons that even Jesus took time away to pray and that we all need to get away in order to recharge. In our family, a few hours on a Saturday once a month would be divine! Since Philip is away from home all week, he doesn’t have the same desire I do to get out of the house, and he wants to be a homebody most weekends. Having this regular opportunity to get out by myself would do me some good. I see myself going to confession, spending time in Adoration, running a few errands, reading at a coffee shop, and working on my blog. I haven’t had a Mother’s Sabbath yet, but I doubt I’ll have trouble making it up as I go!
In addition to my Mother’s Sabbath, I need time to rest with my gal pals without our kiddos. Philip and I think that having some girl time (aside from my Bible study and parish mothers group) two times a month is a healthy amount. (Likewise, he is supposed to schedule regular outings for himself with his buddies.)
Nutrition
I’m still using the Paprika app to organize my recipes and plan our weekly menu. Having a plan in place reduces the amount that we’re eating out and helps us to eat more nutritiously. I build in healthy snacks throughout the week. I need to work on prepping the snacks ahead of time (cut up fruits and vegetables) so that I can access them more easily than the less healthy options. Simply having a list of nutritious snack ideas helps, too.
Exercise
I haven’t been able to get my regular exercise in because we’ve had a constantly shifting schedule during the day with Baby Harry. Now that he’s 6 months and has a relatively regular schedule with sleeping and eating, I’m finally ready to say that I have time to exercise at a regular time. I’ve decided it makes the most sense for me to exercise after my morning prayers before I make breakfast for the kids. If they wake up during this time, they can have quiet reading time until I’m done with my 30 Day Shred DVD. They love acting like my personal trainers with cheerleading or even joining in next to me, so maybe this will turn into a family activity!
Medication
I am so grateful to my Catholic OBGYN and nurse practitioner for helping to treat my hormone irregularities. Through using the Creighton Model and doing a simple blood draw, we were able to identify a progesterone deficiency. Supplementing my progesterone levels helped me to maintain a healthy pregnancy when I was pregnant with Harry. Assuming my progesterone levels remain low in the future, I will be able to get supplements earlier to greatly limit my risk of miscarriage. During the post-partum phase, my nurse practitioner was able to identify post-partum depression and successfully treat me with progesterone therapy. As my body gets back into the swing of things with a cycle, I am going to be on the lookout for PMS as progesterone therapy can limit those symptoms as well. I think Philip would appreciate that, too!
Hygiene and Grooming
With exercising in the morning, I’m still trying to figure out the best time to shower. When do you exercise and shower? I don’t think I’ll ever be a shower in the evening kinda gal. I never feel clean that way. I think I need to move my wake-up call to 5:00 in order to get it all done without interruption. We’ll see how my first week goes. Right now, I’m thinking things will look like this:
- 5:30 Wake up and get dressed to exercise
- 5:40-6:00 Eat breakfast and morning prayer (Daily Readings, Gospel reflection, Morning Offering)
- 6:00 30 Day Shred DVD
- 6:30 Shower (kids have quiet reading time if they’re awake)
- 7:00 Breakfast with kids
Blogging
30 minutes during the kids’ nap time
A few questions for you on the 2nd “P” of Person:
- How do you work on overcoming areas or habits of sin? Do you journal?
- What about rest? What kind of sleep are you getting lately? Do you have something resembling a Mother’s Sabbath? What would your time away look like?
- How do you plan your weekly menu for your crew? Do you have any tips or recipes you’d like to share?
- All of us are busy, but how do you find time to exercise? Do you have a program you love? Do you have any advice for a mama with little ones?
- Is there something you’re eating or a nutrition supplement that’s helping you to feel better? Have you identified any areas of concern in your health?
- When do you fit in your grooming needs? I’d love any tips or advice in this area since it’s tough to get ready AND exercise with the little ones!
- Blogger friends, how do you organize and fit in time to blog? Do you do something to help you organize your thoughts? I feel like my method is to pre-write it all in my head the day before and “brain dump” whenever I get a free chunk of time!
* * *
This is my 6th of 7 posts in Jen Fulwiler’s “7 Days, 7 Posts” challenge. Come on over, join in the fun link-up, and read some great blogs!
![Why I Love Philip (Happy Birthday!)]()
by Catherine | Feb 28, 2014 | Marriage
Happy Birthday, Honey!
I am struggling to find a focus for this post because there are so many things that I want to write about. I am so proud of you for working everyday to become an even better Christian, husband, and father.
The leadership and dedication you’ve shown in your faith is inspiring, and it’s a joy to watch you fall more in love with our Lord. I love it when you lead our family in prayer. Aside from our couple prayer time before bed, watching you across the table during our family Rosary or squeezing your hand at Mass are some of my favorite parts of the week. I am so glad that our children have a daddy who will pray with them and for them on a regular basis. What a blessing! Thank you for taking a leadership role in that capacity and for helping all of us to improve ourselves in that area of our lives.
 |
| Helping the kiddos blow out the Advent wreath candles. Yay, fire! |
As a father, you’re top notch. The kids’ hearts nearly burst at the seams when they hear the front door open and know that you’re home! Thank you for taking the time to give them the love and attention they need right when you walk in the door. You are so good about getting down on the floor, giving big hugs and kisses, and asking them about whatever they are doing. Despite being crazy busy with residency and everything else we have going on with moving, etc., you are great about showing them that taking time to play and be with them will trump the other stuff. They know how much you love them, and they love showing you how much they love you! As your wife and their mother, I can’t tell you how much joy that gives me. I love how good you are at engaging each child individually, connecting with them in different ways, and showing them that you love what makes them them. Even if there’s a lot to be done on your time off, I love that you’re insistent that we always take time out to have quality time with the kids. It’s usually something simple like our library trips, zoo visits, or picnics at the neighborhood park. The kids FREAK OUT when they find out you have a coveted day off and we get to do something special like that with you. If nothing else, residency makes us realize the preciousness of the time we have together. After residency, they’re going to miss your post-call mornings when you bring them donuts!
 |
| Surprising Janie with her first flowers (pink, of course!) on her 4th birthday |
 |
| Playing Princess Candyland as a fam |
You’re the gold standard in the husband department! You’ve always been my #1 cheerleader.
 |
| One of your many love notes. This one was hidden in the dishwasher for me to find in the morning. |
Ever since I started staying at home, thank you for recognizing my need to take little breaks or have time out with girlfriends. You are great about offering me that time and joyfully taking over the home front while I step away. It is such a relief to have a husband that supports and understands my need to be away from time to time so that I can recharge and be an even better wife & mama when I return. You never complain about the work that needs to be done; instead, you joyfully jump into action by making meals, giving baths, doing projects around the house, etc. I love, love, love how invested you are in keeping our relationship only second to our individual relationships with God. It’s such a blessing to have a spouse that understands that we get closer to each other as we individually get closer to God.
Thank you for showing me that you value our relationship above all others–even the kiddos. As demanding as three little ones can be, you are so good at showing me that I’m your top priority at home. Thank you for helping me to coordinate regular date nights and for being such a fun, adventurous date! I think our favorite date will always be having a leisurely meal, pretending we are foodies (we watch Top Chef so we know everything, right?), sipping on some vino, and having some high-quality uninterrupted conversation. I think we’ll always have something new to talk about because you are always wanting to learn something new, work on an aspect of our marriage, improve our parenting skills, or grow even closer to God. We almost always agree on most things, so it’s actually fun when we don’t agree and have a chance to make our case.
 |
| Dinner date for my birthday |
 |
| Our dinner drinks with tapas at España |
I am so excited to see what your 29th year has in store for you! It looks to be a big year of transition and change, and I look forward to going through all of it with you by my side. You are always such an optimistic and calming presence for our little family. I have no doubt that it will all work out swimmingly. I am excited for you to get to start practicing medicine on your own and bless your partners and patients by your presence. I love your humbleness, but you need to know that you’re an absolute rockstar! Thank you for choosing a profession that simultaneously challenges you while allowing you to have a healthy balance as husband and father. I’m of course selfishly glad that the crazy hours of residency will soon be a distant memory, but I’m more happy for you so that you can have more time for hobbies, guy time, our parish, our kids, and our marriage.
Cheers to your 29th year! God willing, I pray that we will have many, many more years of joy-filled marriage together!
 |
Christmas 2013
* * *
This is my 5th of 7 posts in Jen Fulwiler’s “7 Days, 7 Posts” challenge. Come on over, join the fun link-up, and read some great blogs!
|
![Busy Day]()
by Catherine | Feb 28, 2014 | Family, The Homefront
Today’s post is going to be short and sweet because it’s been a busy day. After I publish this, it’s time to put my feet up, have a glass of wine, and watch a show with Philip!
Philip was able to come home around lunchtime, and we spent the rest of the day prepping for our realtor’s visit tonight. Aside from filling out some more paperwork and discussing important details, we finalized the staging of the house.
Harry thinks selling the house is exhausting! He fell asleep on this blanket while we wrapped things up with our realtor. Sweetie pie!
It took longer than we anticipated, but it’s a relief to have the house almost 100% ready and have all of our questions answered.
I wanted to share a few shots of the family room.
After nearly six years, I finally updated the throw pillows. I didn’t realize how bad our other throw pillows were until I asked a close girlfriend what she thought. When she told me, “You should either not leave those out or get new ones,” I knew it was time! I found these cute ones at Garden Ridge.
I’m so proud of myself for getting bright and fun colors since I usually play it safe. They photograph well against the dark couch and chair, too. What a difference some new pillows make!
Alright, off to spend some time with Philip!
* * *
This is my 4th of 7 posts in Jen Fulwiler’s “7 Days, 7 Posts” challenge. Come on over, join in the fun link-up, and read some great blogs!
![The 1st “P” in Our Rule of Life: Prayer]()
by Catherine | Feb 26, 2014 | Faith, Family, Marriage
In case you missed it, part of my Lenten mission this year is to create a Boucher Family Rule of life modeled after Holly Pierlot’s A Mother’s Rule of Life.
Yesterday, I shared the essential tasks of my vocation and wrote a family mission statement.
Today, I’m starting my examination of the “5 P’s”
- Prayer
- Person
- Partner
- Parent
- Provider
I’ll tackle one “P” each day for the next five days.
First up: Prayer.
Holly Pierlot is right on when she writes that we have to schedule prayer “because God isn’t so obviously urgent, because he doesn’t pester us for our attention like our children or sloppy house can.” Holly suggests making a list of all of the things you think ought to comprise a healthy prayer life. For me and where I am in my spiritual journey, those things include:
- Morning Offering
- Remember that the work of my vocation is prayer and consciously offer each chunk of the day to God to “supernaturalize the day” and “tackle every task as a direct response to God, just as if he were asking you, ‘Will you go do your laundry now?'”
- Holly Pierlot has a tremendous section on overcoming sloth by offering God our efforts. She shares Fr. John Hardon’s definition of sloth as “sluggishness of soul or boredom of the exertion necessary for the performance of any good work.”
- Regularly offer God my efforts in mental prayer
- Daily Readings & Gospel Reflection
- Angelus at Noon
- Saint of the Day Reflection
- Family Prayer (Rosary, bedtime prayers, prayer to St. Joseph as our family’s patron saint)
- Couple Prayer with Philip before bed (reading from our Catechism reflection book and spontaneous prayer)
- Regular examination of conscience and regularly scheduled reconciliation
- Journaling about habits of sin and distractions from my vocation
- Mass (start small with one day each week in addition to Sunday and Holy Days of Obligation)
- Holy Hour (Share a holy hour with Philip and alternate weeks that we go)
- Formal Study (Currently working on The Bible Timeline)
After determining the things I would like to have as a part of my regular prayer life, Holly suggests actually putting them into your schedule. For me, it would look like this:
- Throughout the day: Offer chunks of time to God to “supernaturalize my day”
- Before kids wake up: Morning Offering, dedicate day to God, Daily Readings, and Gospel Reflection
- With kids at breakfast: Morning Offering and Saint of the Day Reflection
- 8:15: Daily Mass (starting with one day a week in addition to Sunday & Holy Days)
- Noon: Angelus with the children after lunch
- During children’s naptime: Formal study (Bible Timeline), examination of conscience and journaling (start with once a week)
- After dinner: Family prayer time (Rosary or special prayers according to liturgical season, bedtime prayers)
- 8:00 p.m. every other Tuesday: shared Holy Hour with Philip
- 9:30 p.m.: Couple prayer with Philip (Read from Catechism reflection book, spontaneous prayer)
A few questions for you:
- Do you have an examination of conscience that you particularly like and can share? What about a kid friendly examination?
- What resources do you use to enter into the Daily Readings? A special app? Homilies?
- Do you have a formal study that you would recommend?
- Do you have a saint of the day resource that is great for reading with children? How do you share the stories of saints with your children?
- What does your couple prayer time look like?
- Do you have any insights to share on prayer in general?
Tomorrow, I’ll take on the 2nd P: Person. That entails all of the things I need to do to keep my person healthy and ready to serve.
* * *
This is my 3rd of 7 posts in Jen Fulwiler’s “7 Days, 7 Posts” challenge. Come on over, join in the fun link-up, and read some great blogs!
![The 1st "P" in Our Rule of Life: Prayer]()
by Catherine | Feb 26, 2014 | Faith, Family, Marriage
In case you missed it, part of my Lenten mission this year is to create a Boucher Family Rule of life modeled after Holly Pierlot’s A Mother’s Rule of Life.
Yesterday, I shared the essential tasks of my vocation and wrote a family mission statement.
Today, I’m starting my examination of the “5 P’s”
- Prayer
- Person
- Partner
- Parent
- Provider
I’ll tackle one “P” each day for the next five days.
First up: Prayer.
Holly Pierlot is right on when she writes that we have to schedule prayer “because God isn’t so obviously urgent, because he doesn’t pester us for our attention like our children or sloppy house can.” Holly suggests making a list of all of the things you think ought to comprise a healthy prayer life. For me and where I am in my spiritual journey, those things include:
- Morning Offering
- Remember that the work of my vocation is prayer and consciously offer each chunk of the day to God to “supernaturalize the day” and “tackle every task as a direct response to God, just as if he were asking you, ‘Will you go do your laundry now?'”
- Holly Pierlot has a tremendous section on overcoming sloth by offering God our efforts. She shares Fr. John Hardon’s definition of sloth as “sluggishness of soul or boredom of the exertion necessary for the performance of any good work.”
- Regularly offer God my efforts in mental prayer
- Daily Readings & Gospel Reflection
- Angelus at Noon
- Saint of the Day Reflection
- Family Prayer (Rosary, bedtime prayers, prayer to St. Joseph as our family’s patron saint)
- Couple Prayer with Philip before bed (reading from our Catechism reflection book and spontaneous prayer)
- Regular examination of conscience and regularly scheduled reconciliation
- Journaling about habits of sin and distractions from my vocation
- Mass (start small with one day each week in addition to Sunday and Holy Days of Obligation)
- Holy Hour (Share a holy hour with Philip and alternate weeks that we go)
- Formal Study (Currently working on The Bible Timeline)
After determining the things I would like to have as a part of my regular prayer life, Holly suggests actually putting them into your schedule. For me, it would look like this:
- Throughout the day: Offer chunks of time to God to “supernaturalize my day”
- Before kids wake up: Morning Offering, dedicate day to God, Daily Readings, and Gospel Reflection
- With kids at breakfast: Morning Offering and Saint of the Day Reflection
- 8:15: Daily Mass (starting with one day a week in addition to Sunday & Holy Days)
- Noon: Angelus with the children after lunch
- During children’s naptime: Formal study (Bible Timeline), examination of conscience and journaling (start with once a week)
- After dinner: Family prayer time (Rosary or special prayers according to liturgical season, bedtime prayers)
- 8:00 p.m. every other Tuesday: shared Holy Hour with Philip
- 9:30 p.m.: Couple prayer with Philip (Read from Catechism reflection book, spontaneous prayer)
A few questions for you:
- Do you have an examination of conscience that you particularly like and can share? What about a kid friendly examination?
- What resources do you use to enter into the Daily Readings? A special app? Homilies?
- Do you have a formal study that you would recommend?
- Do you have a saint of the day resource that is great for reading with children? How do you share the stories of saints with your children?
- What does your couple prayer time look like?
- Do you have any insights to share on prayer in general?
Tomorrow, I’ll take on the 2nd P: Person. That entails all of the things I need to do to keep my person healthy and ready to serve.
* * *
This is my 3rd of 7 posts in Jen Fulwiler’s “7 Days, 7 Posts” challenge. Come on over, join in the fun link-up, and read some great blogs!
![Creating Our Boucher Family Rule of Life: Getting Started]()
by Catherine | Feb 25, 2014 | Faith, Family, Marriage, The Homefront
 |
| Holy Family, pray for us! |
In case you missed it, part of my Lenten mission this year is to create a Boucher Family Rule of Life modeled after Holly Pierlot’s A Mother’s Rule of Life.
First of all, what in the world is a Rule of Life? As Holly Pierlot defines it, a Rule of Life “consists primarily in the examination of one’s vocation and the duties it entails, and the development of a schedule for fulfilling these responsibilities in a consistent and orderly way.”
So, before I get started on creating a schedule, I need to determine 2 things:
- What is my vocation?
- What essential duties does my vocation entail?
1. What is my vocation?
To determine my vocation, I considered what I call the proper order of relationships. First and foremost, I am a Child of God. Second, I am a wife. Third, I am a mother. I am all of these things, but it is essential that I keep them in this proper order.
2. What essential duties does my vocation entail?
I could go on and on listing all kinds of duties for my vocation, but I need to pare it down to the essentials to make our Family Rule effective.
- Child of God: Sustain a regular prayer life, frequent the sacraments, attend Mass, and show my love of God through my love of neighbor. I also have the responsibility to care for myself (personal prayer, recreation, good nutrition, exercise, rest) so that I can perform all of my duties well.
- Wife: Holly Pierlot quotes Blessed Pope John Paul II as saying that love could be defined as “availability, acceptance, and help.” As a wife, I have the duty to: be available to my husband (spiritually, physically, intellectually, creatively, emotionally), be accepting of all of him, and to be a helper instead of a hindrance on his journey to sainthood. In order to fulfill my duties as a wife, I need to keep my relationship with Philip second only to my relationship with God, but above all other relationships–even our children.
- Mother: I can’t sum up my duties as a mother more succinctly than Holly Pierlot did in her section on parenting. She says that parenting “is a call to form persons. We’re called to bring God to our children’s spirits, truth to their minds, health to their bodies, skill to their hands, beauty and creativity to their hearts, and in all this, virtue to their wills and sanctity to their souls.” To be my children’s primary educator means remembering Pope Pius XI’s wise words that, “Education consists essentially in preparing man for what he must be, and for what he must do here below, in order to attain the sublime end for which he was created.” In sum, it’s my job as a Christian mother to foster my children’s relationship with God so that they can: hear His voice calling them to their specific vocation, receive the graces to live it out well, and glorify Him through their lives as a preparation for their eternal reward with Him. Ultimately, my job as a mother is to raise my children to become saints.
If those are only the essential duties I have as a Child of God, wife, and mother, I have A LOT to do each day! Now that I have my essential duties listed, we need define our family’s mission (what we’re doing and why) before we create a schedule. That will help our family to maintain our focus and purpose as we go about our everyday lives. Philip and I worked together to create our family mission statement. Here it is:
The Boucher Family is domestic church whose mission is to know, love, and serve God. Our aim is to live intentionally as Jesus’ disciples, propel one another to sainthood, and joyfully share our love of God with others.
I love our family mission statement! It really pares it down to what we’re supposed to be doing everyday. I’m printing it off and putting it on our refrigerator. Maybe someday I can get it beautifully painted on canvas to be hung in a prominent place in our home. (Any crafty friends out there know of a way for me to do this?)
Now that I have my vocation’s duties outlined and our family mission statement written, I need to draft our family’s schedule. In order to do that, I will be examining what Holly Pierlot calls the “5 Ps.”
- Prayer
- Person
- Partner
- Parent
- Provider
Tomorrow, I’ll focus on the first P, Prayer.
Until then, I’d love to hear your thoughts on all of this. Heck, I want to have a book club to discuss everything I’m uncovering in A Mother’s Rule of Life! What are the essential duties of your vocation? If you had a family mission statement, what would it say? Are you fulfilling the essential duties of your vocation? If not, what practical changes can you make today? What is keeping you from fulfilling your essential duties? Are you preventing someone else from fulfilling his/her essential duties?
If you’re interested in creating your own Rule of Life, read A Mother’s Rule of Life and visit Holly Pierlot’s website for some great resources.
* * *
This is my 2nd of 7 posts in Jen Fulwiler’s “7 Posts, 7 Days” challenge. Come on over, join in the fun link-up, and read some great blogs!
