![Revisiting Our Family’s Rule of Life]()
by Catherine | Jan 15, 2015 | Faith, Family, Marriage, The Homefront
I first read Holly Pierlot’s A Mother’s Rule of Life back in Lent 2014. As part of my Lenten mission, I came up with a rough sketch of our Family Rule of Life. Since then, we have moved to a new house in a new city. Now that we’re settled, the kids are back in the school routine, and the craziness of the holidays are over, I’m ready to share how I started revisiting our Family Rule of Life during Advent. While my vocation and its essential duties remain the same, our surroundings, the children’s development, our relationships with God and each other have changed significantly.
Before I jump in, let’s circle back to revisit a few things:
First, what’s a “Rule of Life”?
Holly Pierlot defines a rule of life as an “examination of one’s vocation and the duties it entails, and the development of a schedule for fulfilling these responsibilities in a consistent and orderly way.”
Before I pulled together the first draft of our schedule last year, I needed to determine:
- What’s my vocation? (My answer is what I call this the proper hierarchy of relationships. The order is very intentional here.)
- Child of God
- Wife
- Mother
- What are the essential duties that my vocation entails?
- Child of God: Sustain a regular prayer life, frequent the sacraments, attend Mass, and show my love of God through my love of neighbor. I also have the responsibility to care for myself (personal prayer, recreation, good nutrition, exercise, rest) so that I can perform all of my duties well. (My duties to self will be explored more with the 2nd P, Person.)
- Wife: Holly Pierlot quotes Saint Pope John Paul II as saying that love could be defined as “availability, acceptance, and help.” As a wife, I have the duty to: be available to my husband (Ever hear of SPICE in your NFP training? We are to be available to our spouses Spiritually, Physically, Intellectually, Creatively, Emotionally), be accepting of all of him, and to be a helper instead of a hindrance on his journey to sainthood. In order to fulfill my duties as a wife, I need to keep my relationship with Philip second only to my relationship with God, but above all relationships–even our children.
- Mother: I can’t sum up my duties as a mother more succinctly than Holly Pierlot did in her section on parenting. She says that it is a “call to form persons. We’re called to bring God to our children’s spirits, truth to their minds, health to their bodies, skill to their hands, beauty and creativity to their hearts, and in all this, virtue to their wills and sanctity to their souls.” To be my children’s primary educator means remembering Pope Pius XI’s wise words that, “Education consists essentially in preparing man for what he must be, and for what he must do here below, in order to attain the sublime end for which he was created.” In sum, it’s my job as a Christian mother to foster my children’s relationship with God so that they can: hear His voice calling them to their specific vocation, receive the graces to live it out well, and glorify Him through their lives as a preparation for their eternal reward with Him. Ultimately, it’s my job as a mother to raise my children to become saints.
With my vocation and essential duties at the forefront of our minds, Philip and I worked together last year to create our family mission statement. Here it is:
The Boucher Family is a domestic church whose mission is to know, love, and serve God. Our aim is to live intentionally as Jesus’ disciples, propel one another to sainthood, and joyfully share our love of God with others.
I still want to get our family mission statement on canvas to hang in our kitchen. Any suggestions on a great Etsy shop or artist?
With my vocation’s duties outlined and our family mission statement written, I set out to re-draft our family’s schedule. A lot has changed in one year! In order to do that, I re-examined what Holly Pierlot calls the “5 Ps.”
- Prayer
- Person
- Partner
- Parent
- Provider
Your Turn:
- What would you consider the essential duties of your vocation?
- If you had a family mission statement, what would it say?
- Are you fulfilling the essential duties of your vocation? If not, what practical changes can you make today?
- What is keeping you from fulfilling your essential duties?
- Are you preventing someone else from fulfilling his/her essential duties?
If you’re interested in creating your own Rule of Life, read A Mother’s Rule of Life and visit Holly Pierlot’s website for some great resources. I would LOVE to go through the 5 P’s with you!
![Goddaughter Day]()
by Catherine | Jan 10, 2015 | Faith, Family
My niece, Meghan (who also happens to be my goddaughter), turned 10 over her Christmas vacation. In celebration, I took her out for a fun afternoon.
Last year, we met over cupcakes to discuss what we thought of Anne of Green Gables.
This year, we started our afternoon of fun over lunch at Paradise Bakery. Meghan and her twin brothers are 15 months apart in age, so she has known how to hold her own for quite some time! We had great conversation between bites. I got to hear all about the latest on the school front, the home front, the friend front, and field questions about anything and everything in between.
The two things that stuck out most about during our visit were Meg’s maturity and her big heart. She shared how heartbroken she was for a classmate whose mother recently passed away. She said that it made her realize how special her own mother is to their family and that she couldn’t imagine life without her. We talked about different ways that she can be a good friend, and she had some very thoughtful ideas.
I was thrilled to hear her circle back to a classmate that had been acting like a bully the previous year. Meg shared how she played peacemaker. (Let’s call the classmate Molly.) “I said, ‘Molly, I don’t want to fight anymore. Can we just be friends?’ And she said, ‘Sure!’ And she’s coming to my sleepover tonight!” I told her how proud I was of her for being so kind to someone that hadn’t been so nice to her, and I said that it was really cool of her to invite Molly to her birthday party–especially since the other girls still think she’s a bully. Meg said, “Yeah, they don’t know that she’s nice like I do. I’ll just change the subject and work really hard to include her tonight.”
Isn’t Meg such a doll? I love her new glasses.
Toward the end of our meal, I gave her a little something for her birthday. It was a prayer journal with some fun, colorful gel pens. I had brought along my own prayer journal and showed it to her. I talked about how I loved to journal at her age and said that it helped me to think through times when I was sad, or angry, or wasn’t sure what to do. I said that my favorite part about keeping a prayer journal was looking back at the old entries to see how God worked in my life–especially how He didn’t answer prayers how I wanted Him to, and how it always worked out as it should have. That got us to talking about prayer and Meg asking me how I prayed. She was excited to hear that my prayer life mostly looked like a conversation. We talked about different kinds of prayer, and I showed her how I used my journal. I emphasized that a prayer journal can be whatever she wants it to be, and that it’s just for her and God. Hopefully the conversation helped to show her that daily prayer is both normal and attractive. It didn’t hurt that the journal had some cute butterflies on the cover!
After our lunch, we headed out to go ice skating. I was THRILLED when Meg said that that was what she wanted to do. I took lessons for a few years in junior high and loved it so much that I taught little ones how to skate for awhile. I hadn’t been on the ice in a few years, so it was fun to pull out my skates.
Just like riding a bike!
Meg was a pro! She never had a major wipeout, and there were several times that she went around the ice 5 laps without falling. Way to go, Meg!
We had some more great conversation on the ride home, and I got Meg home in time to get ready for her big slumber party. I’m looking forward to our next Goddaughter Day!
Question for you:
How do you connect with your Godchildren? Meg and I are looking for another book to read together. Any suggestions for something a 10-year-old girl would enjoy? Fire away!
![7QT: Just trying to stay warm]()
by Catherine | Jan 9, 2015 | Family
7QT: This week is dedicated to the potpourri of activities we’ve been doing to distract us from the bitter cold!
-1-
We’ve gotten a lot of mileage out of this drill that Walt received for Christmas. Both of our boys have found fun uses for it.
Harry is a little more conventional and enjoys actually drilling the screws into the drill center board.
Walt, on the other hand, calls the drill his “freeze ray.” He’s just a *TAD* obsessed with all things Despicable Me at the moment, so he’ll take any opportunity he gets to convert an object into Gru’s freeze ray.
This morning, the boys were playing on the ground while I got ready. Walt handed Harry his crayon piggy bank. “Here, Harry, this can be your heat ray, and I’ll get you with my freeze ray!”
-2-
Last Friday night, Philip and I watched The Hundred-Foot Journey, so we had Indian food on our brains. While I was taking my niece out for her birthday Saturday (more on that later!), Philip took it upon himself to bake some naan. He thought it’d be a fun baking project since we had decided we’d have Indian takeout when I got home that evening.
It was delicious! He did a great job! I wish I could share the recipe, but he says he combined 5 different ones that he found online.
-3-
Philip just asked me what I was writing about.
“How you baked some naan to go with our takeout last weekend.”
“Don’t be naan-chalant about it!”
He’s a punny guy! We don’t get out much, folks.
-4-
We got a little dusting of snow, so the kids insisted on running around in it in the backyard.
Sometimes Harry gets a little too much loving…
There he goes!
-5-
Our associate pastor came over for dinner, and he gained several big fans. Harry absolutely ADORES Father! Every time Father put him down, Harry would turn back toward him with his arms outstretched. Walt’s favorite thing about Father is his hair. “He has hair JUST LIKE ME!”
Father joined us after dinner for our GodTeens meeting. The teens had a list of questions they had come up with ahead of time. Father did a great job answering their questions, and the teens really seemed to enjoy getting to spend time with Father in a more informal setting. We are so grateful that Father would carve out an evening to spend time with our family and GodTeens.
-6-
Jane and I had some special girl time this week when just the two of us got to do the grocery shopping. For Jane, the highlight was arriving at Sam’s early enough to get to enjoy a delicious pastry.
-7-
Walt’s best friend from preschool is a special little lady. We’ve arranged to have her come over for regular playdates at our house after preschool, and Walt is so smitten. It works out nicely because Walt and Walt’s lady friend are more than happy to let Jane join in their fun. The three of them had a ball earlier this week. Mr. Walt still takes an afternoon nap, so having a friend over for an afternoon playdate was quite a feat. Walt was fading toward the end of the playdate, so I decided to put on (what else?) Despicable Me 2. I was able to snap this adorable pic of Walt and his lady friend snuggled up close. Aren’t they the cutest?
Have a great weekend! For more 7QT posts, head over to this week’s link-up at Kelly Mantoan’s blog This Ain’t the Lyceum.
![Put It To Work 9]()
by Catherine | Jan 5, 2015 | Faith, Family, Marriage
Happy Monday! That means it’s time to Put It To Work! For those of you who are new to my blog, Put It To Work is my regular feature on Mondays. Monday mornings can be chaotic & stressful. I think that makes it a perfect time for us to swap prayer intentions with the promise of “putting them to work” for one another.
What’s that mean?
It means that we’ll actively unite any little suffering we might have during the week to the cross for the other person’s intention.
Here are my intentions for the week:
- GodTeens: Our parish assistant pastor is joining us for dinner and our GodTeens meeting afterward on Wednesday. Our teens came up with questions to ask him that I sent ahead of time. We’ll spend the evening in discussion. Please pray that the time is fruitful, that the Holy Spirit speaks through our assistant pastor, and that the teens’ ears are opened to hearing whatever it is that God wants them to hear.
- Marriage: For a renewed commitment to our couple prayer time before bed. Philip and I are trying to implement something different as we begin the new year. Please pray for our success!
- Kids: For a smooth transition as we get back into the everyday preschool routine after Christmas vacation.
- A personal intention.
Your turn! What intentions can I start “putting to work” for you this week? I will add them to my prayer journal and pray for you by name throughout the week. Please share them in the comment box below, on the blog Facebook page, or send them to me via the “contact” button on the main menu bar.
Thank you in advance for your prayers! Hope you’re having a blessed start to 2015!
![7QT: What we were up to during my blogging hiatus]()
by Catherine | Jan 2, 2015 | Faith, Family
In early December, I decided to take a little blogging/Facebook hiatus for Advent and the beginning of the Christmas season. I thought I’d dedicate my first 7QT post of 2015 to what we were up to this past month. Mostly, it’s going to be a crazy photo dump that I’m going to manipulate into 7 loose categories. I haven’t uploaded the pictures from our “real” (fancy schmancy) camera, so we’re just going to have to settle for grainy cell phone pics. I’ll get my act together as a real blogger someday!
-1-
We had fun getting ready for Christmas!
Harry decided to become one with the packaging from the Nativity scene
You haven’t lived if you’ve never tried getting that staticky stuff off of a squirming 16-month-old!
That silly Elf Bernie showed up for more shenanigans this Advent
He left with a flourish this year!
St. Nick remembered to visit the morning after Mama played Bunco late on Friday, December 5th. What a guy!
The kids loved our time around the Advent wreath after dinner.
There’s something magical about singing “O come, O come, Emmanuel” by candlelight with your family.
We even got to have an unexpected, romantic candlelit dinner (thanks, Advent wreath!) one night when the power went out just as we were setting the table!
-2-
Harry decided that Monty was the most comfy seat in the house
Monty isn’t so sure about Harry’s new-found fondness for him
It looks like Monty’s saying, “Alright, Mom. It was cute the first time, but this is getting old!”
Harry also started making the most terrible stink eye face you’ve ever seen! Stink eye selfie!
-3-
We had a Christmas party with our GodTeens. One of the guys brought “Ninja-Bread Cookies.” Aren’t they awesome?!
Jane and Walt loved ’em! “KA-CHOW!”
-4-
There was a whole lotta “holy leisure” while the kids had time off from preschool.
Brothers watching movies in jammies
“Special Day” with Walt. Lunch at Runza (who doesn’t need a bowl of ice cream with a shake after a burger and fries?!) and a trip to Barnes & Noble
Dr. Walt giving Jane a check-up with Daddy’s otoscope
Cheers! Hot chocolate in sippy cups while we looked at Christmas lights in the car
Baking boys
-5-
We had fun with the Bouchers on Christmas Eve
Jane got her very own Lambie pillow!
Walt and silly Olaf wearing Papa’s glasses
Blue sweater boys
Our best attempt at a family pic
Got the whole group in a shot using Maddy’s selfie stick!
Jane has been sleeping with her cuddly Lambie pillow and little Lambie ever since
-6-
And we had a quiet Christmas morning with our little family
Opening stockings. Walt got Despicable Me 2. His entire Christmas vacation has revolved around Gru and his minions.
Monty got a new leash and collar
We put on Despicable Me 2 while getting everyone ready for Mass. Harry was ENTHRALLED!
A kinda sorta okay group pic in front of our parish Nativity scene. (Yes, that’s a minion in a Santa hat that Walt is holding. It came with his movie, and he had to bring it to celebrate Jesus’ birthday.) Note to self: From this year on, we will ALWAYS go to Mass on Christmas Day morning. It was so much more peaceful than the chaos of the Christmas Eve mob.
-7-
And we finished out the fanfare with a Christmas evening celebration with the Witts.
Silly selfie with Daddy
Mom & Dad in front of da bear
Harry, for one, thinks Grandpa has the best stuffed animals around!
Waiting for Santa’s annual big appearance
We got to celebrate Grandma and Grandpa’s 65th wedding anniversary a few nights later. 65 YEARS!!! I took a pic of them sharing stories from their early years. What a fun night!
The Guys
The Girls
Off to enjoy these last few days of Christmas vacation with the fam! To read more 7QT posts from other bloggers, head over to Kelly Mantoan’s blog, This Ain’t The Lyceum!
![See You in 2015!]()
by Catherine | Dec 5, 2014 | Faith, Family
I’ve decided it’s time to say “yes” by saying “no.” I’m getting off Facebook for the rest of December, and I’m taking a hiatus from blogging, too.
It’s time to be still.
It’s time to prepare my heart, our family, and our home to welcome the Christ Child.
I want this Advent to be a holy one. So, this month, instead of coming up with new blog posts or wasting time on Facebook, I’ll be *trying* to imitate John the Baptist.
“He must increase, but I must decrease.” (John 3:30)
To that end, I have a few goals:
- Finalize my 2015 Board of Spiritual Directors. (Thanks for the inspiration, Lisa!)
- Continue to start the day before the children wake up in quiet prayer. It’s a game changer!
- Since Advent is the start of a new liturgical year, it feels like the perfect time to create new resolutions. During the rest of Advent, I’ll be re-reading A Mother’s Rule of Life and revisiting/revising the 5 P’s I came up with last Lent. Our home, our family, and our hearts have changed since then. It’s time to make some updates! In case you don’t remember, the 5 P’s are:
- Prayer
- Person
- Partner
- Parent
- Provider
I will be making baby steps to start implementing my new resolutions, and I’ll share ’em with you once I’m back in 2015. Until then, I pray that you and your family have a blessed Advent and a Merry Christmas! Please continue to send your prayer intentions while I am away!
